Apologies

I do apologize for the previous post that was filled with my insecurities and whining. I've started exercising again, consistently chalking up 40 minutes/day, and already, my mood is improving. With the back and forth of the weather and the return of my almighty allergies, I should have known it was coming (the whining facet to my personality) and should have kept my exercising up.

And, as a side note, I'm writing this first thing in the morning. A morning in which I did NOT want to get up (when do I ever?) as the rain is beating a rhythm against the tin roof, which we all know is prime sleep inducing music. So, please forgive any rambling and non point making statements!

Thank you, BzBiff for your kind and wise words. They do help and they should help you as well. I know that he gets what he needs. I know that he's got it 'good' for the most part. As for worrying about him, well, it's my job. And being the natural worrier and gloomy person that I am, I do a bit more of it than anyone ever realizes. It's just that the logical side of my brain kicks in before I can spout off about it, normally. And then, shit happens (or doesn't, it doesn't really matter) and I get depressed and sad and pathetic and whiny and some of it comes spilling out. I think that one of the best facets to mine and Ty's relationships is that I am as fascinated and in love with him as anyone could be. And while I do see what you and anyone else might, it's just a flash in the pan. Because, as a parent, our own views of our own kids are slightly distorted from everyone else's. Not so much in a bad way (thinking of those monster children, who destroy everything and anything they touch and their parents blame it on anything and everyone else) but just with a different bird's eye view. Anyway, thanks again. It means a lot to have your support and your friendship to help me along the way.

NEWS FLASH: It's raining again. And since it isn't snowing, I'm not complaining. I'm one of those people who could live in Portland or Seattle and not bitch about the weather. I love rain. Of course, I'd like to see the sun again soon before I forget what the hell it looks and feels like, but I'll survive.

Work is work, personal life is still the same. Now it includes me coming home and working out (indoors, which always makes it feel more like a chore than being outside on my bike or walking). And so I stumble on....