Dammit all to hell

I just wrote this big long post about my friend JR and went to post it, it was ate up. By something that likes to hear me curse in a violent, Turrett's sort of way. GODDAMMIT!

Anyway, the post went something like this....

It's Been a Long, Winding Road

I am missing my favoritist blogger, ever, JR. I know where she's gone, not 100% sure as to how she got there, but still missing her in her normal spot.

I have (had) been reading JustRose for... a year now??? Goodness. I cried for her hurts, I laughed at the ingenuity of her daughter. I applauded her for finding her wings. I prayed for her and her family. I sent her numerous hugs via email. Have I ever met her? No. Have we talked on the phone? No. Good intentions and all that. But still... reading someone's blog over any period of time, say over a month or two, you feel close to them. You've read their thoughts, feelings, fears, laughter. You read it and hear it clearly, when they are honest and when they write as well as JR. There was just something about her that drew me in. And I looked forward to reading the Rowhouse every day. She is always so humble about it when I'm sure there are masses out there just like me. Well, if there aren't masses, by God, there should be! Maybe it was her absolute and total dedication of her heart to her daughter. Maybe it was the trials that preceded the gift of said daughter. Maybe it was the missing of her own mother while she was trying to find her way. Whatever it was, it's still got me and I look forward to many more laughs and the sharing of angst with her, even if only in email.

So, here's to you, JR!! You've come a long way baby! I'll be seeing you around...

Hump day

The carnie man showed up yesterday. He knew he was going to have to do an interview, so he showered and wore clean clothes. Figures. Nobody saw him the first time, except for myself and now they all think I'm a raging bitch with nothing better to do than lie about others hygiene. I was surprised that he cleaned up so well, still a little bit freaked out about the big ol' tattoo on his neck, but that's just me, I suppose. I'm kind of a wimp.

Today's issues include this screwed up board that I am on. When I joined them, they were firing the current day care provider (who I am close friends with). I actually cried during that meeting because I was so upset. Yes, I'm allotta wimp. I am a passionate person when it comes to something that I wholeheartedly believe in and I was devastated about the whole thing. She was an excellent provider. Yes, she was kind of messy. But my god, you should see my house with only ONE kid in it. I can't imagine what it would look like with anywhere from 4 to 6 kids in it on a day to day basis. Not to mention 2 lazy teenagers of my own. Anyway, to the current issue with the board... When I came into it, two of the four had no idea what we were doing. There was one lady on it who had been there for quite some time and another girl that had been on it for 2-3 months. Well, now the lady who has been there for some time has resigned as president after getting into a disagreement with the other girl that was there for a while. She left, not the president, but the other girl. So now we are left with 2 of us that are like a couple of sheep, just following along. And the resigned president. No one wants to be president. They (the other 2) have decided that they want ME to be president, I don't wanna be president. I want to be secretary. My god. What a screwed up organization. I told them to get someone else to join the board and elect THEM president. See the way my mind works? I think I'm losing hair. Not to mention any tenuous grip I may have on what sanity I have left... Too bad it's not pounds I'm losing.

And cat shit smell has permeated my house, therefore permeating my nostrils FOREVER. I hate, hate, hate cat shit smell. And the lady that had the cats before was feeding them canned salmon, so they smell like DEATH when they poop. Death that has been lying around for a week in tropical conditions. YUCK. So my nights are spent changing, washing, Clorox-ing a litter box, burning numerous candles, spraying Febreze everytime I walk by the bottle. Opening windows until the sun goes down and then closing them all again. The litter box is in the laundry room, I am hoping the stench doesn't infiltrate the dryer and make the clothes smell like something a cloud of flies will follow around.

And the day care provider brought up my boy's good for nothing shit-heel of a father. Her husband pointed out that his dad was the guy at the bar with the "Flying Nun Hat". I will put a post together about that sometime. Even though he so very much sucks as a father, I miss him as my friend. We had some good times.

Ok, I've complained enough. It's sunny today, little cool, but it will warm up. Two days until payday!!! Two days until the weekend!! Preschool is starting at day care on the 10th! My son cracks me up and I love him so much it hurts. I have much to be thankful for, much to be thankful for, much to be thankful for.... I will repeat this until I feel better. Hopefully.

All the world loves a carnival, just not the carnies...

So.. Tuesday morning. Not a lot to report here. It's quiet, I'm listening to Kid Kraddick in the Morning. Overcast, might rain today.

I was informed yesterday that one of the supervisors is going to interview and probably hire this guy today. I've met this guy, he had to come in and do a background check. The man smells. Badly. No, not in a good Axe sort of way, but in a "I haven't bathed in a month, I don't believe in deodorant (it causes cancer, haven't you heard?)" sort of way. He seems to be a nice man. He was a carnie. Not that I have anything against carnival workers, but some of them seem somewhat coyote (shifty, like they are looking out of the corner of their eye for an escape. Who knows what from. Who WANTS to know what from). I know a kid that worked for a carnival. He grew up where I live now and the other night he helped me take a very drunk woman to her boyfriend's house. (I don't know how I get into these situations. I say perhaps 6 words to a person, usually an older woman 45-50 and for some reason when they get drunk, I am their best friend and will help them figure out all of their complex issues, while drunk, nonetheless. Or so they think.) And this lady was a-n-g-r-y. At her asshole boyfriend. Who I find to be a very intelligent, soft spoken, compassionate and very easy going man. I think he might also be a drug dealer, but that opens a whole other baggy of questionable substance. Anyway, she was laying on the sidewalk shrieking like a mad person and she wanted me. Me, being the nice girl that I am, asked her what she needed. Apparently, she needed, um, legs? Seems hers had given out. So this kid, D, carried her (yes, carried her piggy back) to the trailer park where her bf lives. So, to wrap it up, I don't have anything against carnival workers. Especially when they are nice enough to carry a 50 year old woman (who REALLY liked my younger sister, if you know what I mean and I think you do!) who might vomit down his neck at any time, up a slight incline for about 2 blocks. With an Artic gale blowing in his face. He's a nice boy. Too bad he's under 21, cuz I would so do him, just as thanks....hahaha. If I could get the carnie image out of my minds eye.

Anyway, I must go and prepare myself for this man to arrive. I will light candles and maybe get the hospital strength air freshener/disinfectant to spray before and after he is here. Also alcohol wipes for the pen he uses. Am I terrible? I don't mean to sound judgmental. I'm sure he is an ok guy. He just doesn't bathe and, for me, personally, I can NOT stand dirty body smell. Blech. And I've known a couple of these people. I am always nice and say hello with a smile. I wait until I'm out the door or my back is turned to gag. Promise.

Well, hell...

Yesterday, I went and got my cat, Twitch. She kept my ass up all friggin' night long. Because not only did she want to sleep in mama's bed, she wanted all 4 of her wild kitten children up there as well. They are all pretty wild from being born and raised as outside cats, up until now. So, nice person that I am... Everytime one would make the long haul, crawling up the blankets to get up on the bed, I would sit up and talk to them. They scatter all over the place. I swear, I could see Twitch's eyes glare at me in the dark, "You bitch". So I'm tired, the kid's tired. I was up at 5:30 am and he was up at 5:45 am.

The boy doesn't do change well. Not only has our household grown by 5 cats, overnight, but he didn't sleep very well, citing the aforementioned felines as the cause. And guess what? Today is a day off for the daycare provider. My son, his 2 year old cousin and I walked into the day care and my son promptly fell apart. The cousin didn't even bat an eyelash, she was just looking for breakfast. But my son went into meltdown mode at 7:50 this morning. The poor fill in babysitter; she was almost in tears herself over the whole thing. I stealthily maneuvered the child proof door knob cover and cracked open the door to leave and the little shit scented fresh air. Out the door he went, running down the street and screaming like he had just woke up in a waterbed with Freddy Krueger. Not fun first thing in the morn, I assure you. Anyway, I brought him to work with me for a few because when he gets that worked up, he'll bawl until he passes out. I told him, after being here for about 15 minutes, that the babysitter is married to a cowboy that works here on the ranch. At the 30 minute mark, he was ready to go, but "only if you realllllly wanna take me". Ah, my little manipulator. They learn so young...

Other than that, it is just Monday. Pretty quiet around here, of which I am thankful. The sun is out with some wispy, clear clouds. Little bit of a breeze. Birds calling everywhere. None of the snow that we saw on Friday. Yes, the first day of fall and it snowed here. Down here in the valley wasn't so bad. Probably an inch on top of rain so we had some major slush, but up in the mountains, where the cowboys are gathering cattle, they got some good snow. Maybe 2-3 inches. Wonder if that's a harbringer of the winter to come? Last winter we got a lot of snow. Not much precip. but a lot of powder. Yuck, I can't believe it's already time to check out snow, wind, hail, rain proof Halloween costumes. I wonder what I can talk the boy into this year. Of course, he only wants to be a cowboy.... We'll see.

Filthy Rich Cattle Drive or whatever

I just finished watching Filthy Rich Cattle Drive. Just so you know, if I ever should meet Fabian Basabe in a dark alley after a night of margaritas on the rocks (cuz you never really know, it could happen), he will never be seen or, thank god, heard again. What a prick. Really. I cannot stand that holier-than-thou attitude he pulls with those cowboys (and cowgirl). I wanna see the trail boss KICK FABIAN'S ASS, in the worst way. In my little fantasy world, it would end with a very humble Fabian and a, hopefully, nekkid cowboy. You know, a girl can never get enough of naked cowboy sightings. Well, unless you count the fake cowboy Chippendales, but really, who counts them at all? They all look the same to me... dumb. Aren't they all gay, anyway?

End of my weekend. It wasn't really a productive one. I cleaned, but you can't tell. I went and kidnapped my renegade cat, Twitch (yes, it IS an indication of her personality) and her 4 kittens. Don't know the sexes of the kittens. I'm thinking they'll end up as barn cats or owl fodder. Owls are kind of viscous creatures and they make off with quite a few kitties around here. Owls and cougars. And coyotes. I live in a modern day Laura Ingalls world. And so... I'm off to read "Boss of the Plains" - a story about John B. Stetson, who created my sons most favorite apparel item - the cowboy hat. And another book about mustangs titled "Where the horses ran free" or some shit.

Is this thing on????

I am sitting here wondering why in the hell I chose to do this. I know that because of the way my life is, I don't have hardly anything to say, well anything of interest. I suppose the covert social butterfly inside of me has goaded me into it. So I will just blog on what I know from day to day.

I live in a very small town in Oregon. I also happen to live on a cattle ranch. Both provide an endless series of dramas. Some of them funny, some sad, some maddening and some border on absolutely ridiculous. I work on the ranch as an office manager/secretary/employee liaison/employee confidant/secret keeper of all sorts. Because my life occurs around these soap opera dramas and my boy, I suppose that's what you'll hear about.

As for now, I've spent too much time setting things up. I've got a house to clean, children to feed and groceries to buy. That should probably be the other way around, groceries to buy, children to feed and a house to clean. Because God knows, you can't do anything with hungry kids hanging around.